Thursday, November 06, 2008

The best gift of all..

At last..

After 8 months of waiting from the time we found out that we had conceived her..

After 10 months since the wedding..

After 23 months since we got engaged and dreaming of having a child together..

After 1 1/2 years since we bought her first clothes.. M & Ms baby rompers which looked too cute to pass so we got it for our planned first child..

After months of paranoia and worries throughout the pregnancy..

Our little bundle of joy arrived at 2.43pm on 02nd Nov 2008.

Now comes another years and years of paranoia and worries..

and lots of sleepless nights..

I can remember clearly when I first found out that I am gonna be a daddy..

I had just landed into Brisbane on 04th March 2008. While I was just stepping out of the airport when I felt my phone beeped.. so at the entrance of the airport, while waiting for the rest of the crew, I checked my phone.. and there was this msg from my wife..

"Pls msg me when u land. Make sure u do..."

and..

"I got something very impt to tell u. It's nothing bad. I bet u tt its not bad news"

Obviously, I wasnt gonna msg her. Out of my pure kanchiongness for the "something impt", I called her right at the airport entrance..

And she told me the beautiful news.. that she tested positive using the home-test pregnancy kit..

I froze..

Totally..

I'm gonna be a dad.

I was totally speechless. I forgot at that point of time that I was in Brisbane.. coz for a moment I thought I was in Heaven.

A leading stewardess next to me saw my face changred and asked me right after I put down the phone.. "What happened?"

I couldnt talk for a moment.. I could just smile..

One of the happiest moments of my life..

I was totally crazily happy..

8 months later.. I was crazier and happier..

Of course.. initially it came as a mixed feeling.. from the time my wife had her first contraction that beautiful morning of the 02nd of Nov... I was so excited abt her arrival.. and still hoping that she remains a SHE coz of all the dresses and the pink stuffs we had already bought.. if she turned out to be a HE, we cant possibly let my son wear the dresses.

I saw the pain she had to go through, and felt totally helpless, coz, as a husband.. I could do nothing to ease that pain..

I was just praying that everything will go fine and the labour will be fast and uncomplicated..

She came through at 2.43pm, and the first thing I noticed when she was coming out was.. she started screaming when she was just HALFWAY out of my wife.. no need for butt hitting to get her to cry.. no Ma'am.. this little girl is capable of doing it right from the womb..

That was the most beautiful sound I had ever heard..

The doc placed her right on top of my wife and though I had always pretended to be concerned abt her gender, I was actually more concerned abt her condition and I was scanning for any physical imperfections.. not that we would love her any less if she does.. but at least if she does.. we can be prepared from the beginning to do something abt it..

Our little bundle of perfection remained a little girl and thus became the official owner of the dresses.

Through the pregnancy.. I was so paranoid..

What if I was sick and had passed some sickness to my little baby?

What if I am sick with some deadly sickness and wont be able to see her..

What if I had died before she came and I became a nightly story that her mom tells her on how I could have been a good dad..

What ifs..

Then I realised that I was being too paranoid and I guessed that every father-to-be would go through the same phases of paranoia.. So I decided to be more optimistic and start planning for our lives together..

Right after I cut off her umbilical cord, the one of the nurses took her to the warmer to warm her up.. and was the first to notice and comment.. that my daughter has a deep dimple on her right..

Wow..

And considering the fact that she has a beautiful mom..

I was planning on how to interrogate her upcoming suitors.. the ones who attempts to be my son-in-law.. so I shall list down the criterias one of these days..

Right after I buy a shotgun to place in front of the house to scare them away.

We got EXACTLY what we had prayed for..

We wanted a baby right after we got married.. we didnt.

Coz if we had gotten her during the first month, it would have been impossible for us to do what we did during the honeymoon.. up the mountain, but we wouldnt have been able to ski and snowmobile and all those things we did and my wife will not be feeling good..

So we conceived her during the honeymoon..

We had wanted a girl to be the first baby..

And we got a girl to be our first baby..

My wife had an easy pregnancy.. or rather.. much much easier than I had expected and anticipated.. so it made things so much easier for me as well..

No morning sickness, no moodiness.. just during her 5th month, she felt pain at the tailbone and close to the end of the pregnancy, she was starting to feel the pain at the pelvic when the baby started to move downwards..

She didnt feel the Braxton Hicks.. and felt her very first contraction pain hours after the water bag broke..

The delivery was very very smooth and fast..

I had used up all my annual leave for the wedding and the honeymoon.. so the only available leave that I had was my 7 days matrimonial leave that was to be used within 12 months of the wedding..

So initially, I had wanted to apply for the leave from 10th Nov till 16th Nov, coz the expected due date was the 11th..

So our gynae mentioned that if I would apply for it on the 10th, my daughter would have come out when I come back from flight.. so he told me to apply for the leave a week earlier as it is a trend now that they give birth on the 39th week..

So I applied for my leave from 03rd Nov, and I was off from work from 02nd Nov..

and she came on the 02nd Nov.. right on the date that I was hoping she would arrive.

We wanted her birthdate NOT to coincide with anyone so she can have a birthday party just for herself.. and true enough.. she has her own date.. and it only coincide with Shahrukh Khan but he's not invited for the birthday party.

We chose to have her delivered in a private hospital as compared to KKH coz of some horror stories that we have heard.. so we chose Gleneagles Hospital..

I compare Gleneagles to a rich, pretty girl who has an attitude.. it looked all glam and pretty from the outside, but u have to be patient and swallow ur anger and bear the attitude..

Somehow I think they chose the best of their staff to be at the frontline to present a good front.. but I find the nurses very grumpy and and always in a bad mood.

Not the Filipino nurses coz they are mostly polite and nice.. but the local ones..

But they get most of the things done.. MOST.. not all..

Coz when we informed the nurses that the baby has a discharge on her right eye and asked for some swaps to clean it up, she didnt come back.. had to inform another one and waited for more than half an hour for it..

And so I had to go over to the nursery and blasted at the nursing officer coz all that I wanted was a clean swap so I can clean my baby's eye myself..

I didnt even ask them to do it. I didnt want to delay any longer coz I'm a new dad and I'm paranoid and I wanna make sure that my daughter don't end up having an infected eye.

The second nurse came to us shortly afterwards to apologize coz she was stuck with another patient..

Fine.. but it didnt excuse the first nurse to ignore us anyway..

And the Malay girl at the cashier's, as I headed down in the morning, was so aloof and cold, and abrupt in her manners..

Except in the afternoon when she was attending to some ang mohs, then I saw her smile..

But the counter staff at the admission.. they are not short of fantastic.. very helpful and friendly.. and the admission when we came in was effortless..

The staff at the labour ward was good too.. nice and friendly and took care of my wife as much as I had thought they could afford to..

But we decided to go to Gleneagles coz we knew that the baby will be taken care of.. I spoke to a male nurse somewhere just not too long before my baby's birth that in his experience during the attachment in KKH, he saw a baby who's back was lined with feaces coz they were having too many babies and too little nurses.

And our first time at the polyclinic a day after I came back from Brisbane to confirm the pregnancy before we wailed out to tell the world.. we were hurried out of the clinic by the doctor who was more concerned abt going for lunch even though we arrived at the polyclinic way before lunch time and was delayed by the registration process and the waiting time..

and to compare that to our gynae, Dr KW Lee.. wow..

Of course, there's a price to pay for everything though.. and at the end of the day.. I knew that I had done all I can to make sure that I provided what I can for my wife and daughter during the pregnancy and delivery..

So my little baby princess has officially become a Mother..

And this old man, after almost 36 years of his life.. has officially become a Father..

and I promise u, my little girl.. that I will be the best dad I could ever be for u..

So, my darling.. I present u to the world..

And will guide u through ur life, in which I plan to be a very integral part of, no matter how intrusive and naggy and old fashioned u think I am..

I used to be cool though.. even if u find it hard to believe when u are old enough to read this..

So now, I present to the world..

My little baby girl..

Who's picture I stole from my wife..


Nadya az-Zahra Binte Zulkarnain

1 comment:

mangobiru said...

Alhamdullilah! Gosh .. Zul you WILL have a hard time chasing away the boys! haha .. she's soooo beautiful :)

You should be proud of Zahirah .. she did an awesome job, you both did.

Let's not worry too much of the IFs and the negatives Zul! Be positive, happy and just enjoy the moments, one day at a time... Take care :)